haha i love how we changed the background back. i guess we can never let go of the past. oh well, time goes on, ready or not.
omg. guess what me and rina freaking did. we dyed our hair. BLACK. omg. i mean this is just like...BAM. i mean if you had asked me a week ago if i was going to dye my hair, i would've been like um, hellllll no. but, here i am. haha. the problem is that we used the demi-permanant crap, so that means that it like washes out in the shower. soooo we're like petrified to take a freaking shower!! we have problems. like intense, completely insane, problems. :)
so, recently we've been getting close with our aunt. and she's completely successful and rich and all that stuff. and we've been helping her get some things done for money, and with the promise that she's going to come on trips with us to places all over the country, and eventually, the world. she has a million and four pictures from her life, and we were sorting them for her, and she was telling us all about her life. then we come to find that she was an AWESOME chick. i mean she was a partier and she married right out of high school and accidently got pregnant, and then of course her and her husband broke up before the kid was even a year and so she had to support her kid and she went to college and eventually married our uncle (who she completely adores) and she's totally successful. like i never would have expected that from her, it's amazing. she said she had so much fun, and she wants us to experience life and everything as well. she wants us to be more outgoing and to just have fun! i really look forward to spending more time with her cause she really is like becoming a sort of mentor to us and it's really awesome!
we might be posting some pictures of our most recent venture to the country. we went to the same places as last time (though without climbing the tree because it was just FREEZING). and it's incredible how that place can seem to change so much, and yet, it will always be there.
till next time-
Ray
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Thursday, January 1, 2009
wow it's kinda funny how we still have this even though no one even looks at it. pretty amusing and yet pretty sad. haha.
things are the same as usual....we're on break at the moment. oh that reminds me: IT'S 2009!!! wow. another year gone....it's incredible how quickly time goes by. and of course we have to have a new years revolution. ours is pretty good if i do say so myself. we want to take more chances. take control of fate. be able to look back on this year and think: damn. look at us go. we want to make changes and become stronger and independent. of course this is way easier said than done, and most new years resolutions don't really work out. because most people just want to lose weight, they work at it for about a week, and then give up when they don't see the results they want. so let's not call this a new years resolution, let's call this....a life style change. a new beginning. a new life. a new us.
and since no one reads this, there is no one to bore about the fact that everytime we post we are likely to bring up the one we lost. the one that we will never forget. we looked at some of our old posts and comments today...wow i mean i am just at a loss for what to say. you told us never to doubt you. that you always thought about us and never forgot about us those times that you left before. was it true? any of it? we need to know. we need you to know that we need to know. we won't forget. no matter how long you're gone. even if it's forever. we will always wonder about you. about what it was that made you leave. you changed us. you encouraged us. you made us who we are today. we need you to know that. we need you to come back. i don't want to beg...but really at this point i feel as though i could get on my knees and just scream for you to come back to us. i'm sorry about before when we left for a month or whatever. i'm not sure if that's what the problem was but...whatever it was...we're sorry. i am sorry that after you left i freaked out...but i needed to get out what i was feeling. please...if you read this and feel nothing and want nothing to do with us and have basically nothing to say...then i guess....just leave it at that. and if that's how it is...try and remember. think back. remember the very beginning...up until the very end....remember how it was? the way we depended on eachother? please. just...give us something. we need answers. we need to know that you cared. we need to know that it was real.
time's a funny thing...has it really been seven months......
R&R
things are the same as usual....we're on break at the moment. oh that reminds me: IT'S 2009!!! wow. another year gone....it's incredible how quickly time goes by. and of course we have to have a new years revolution. ours is pretty good if i do say so myself. we want to take more chances. take control of fate. be able to look back on this year and think: damn. look at us go. we want to make changes and become stronger and independent. of course this is way easier said than done, and most new years resolutions don't really work out. because most people just want to lose weight, they work at it for about a week, and then give up when they don't see the results they want. so let's not call this a new years resolution, let's call this....a life style change. a new beginning. a new life. a new us.
and since no one reads this, there is no one to bore about the fact that everytime we post we are likely to bring up the one we lost. the one that we will never forget. we looked at some of our old posts and comments today...wow i mean i am just at a loss for what to say. you told us never to doubt you. that you always thought about us and never forgot about us those times that you left before. was it true? any of it? we need to know. we need you to know that we need to know. we won't forget. no matter how long you're gone. even if it's forever. we will always wonder about you. about what it was that made you leave. you changed us. you encouraged us. you made us who we are today. we need you to know that. we need you to come back. i don't want to beg...but really at this point i feel as though i could get on my knees and just scream for you to come back to us. i'm sorry about before when we left for a month or whatever. i'm not sure if that's what the problem was but...whatever it was...we're sorry. i am sorry that after you left i freaked out...but i needed to get out what i was feeling. please...if you read this and feel nothing and want nothing to do with us and have basically nothing to say...then i guess....just leave it at that. and if that's how it is...try and remember. think back. remember the very beginning...up until the very end....remember how it was? the way we depended on eachother? please. just...give us something. we need answers. we need to know that you cared. we need to know that it was real.
time's a funny thing...has it really been seven months......
R&R
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Friday, October 24, 2008
Inevitable uncertainty
Mmmm. It feels so good to be back! :D
it feels like i should have so much to say... we've been gone for so long! i mean, we needed a break. it was apparent. reaching your breaking point isn't always pretty. but it is when people seem to be the most beautiful. to me, at least. when you are that final moment where you reach the point where it's too much. you aren't capable of handling it anymore. it's just so raw, and real. and that's beautiful. i had reached my breaking point. and i felt real. everything in this world is so fake, and i felt real. and it was freeing.
but i've had time to get over it, and i took advantage of that time, and, subsequently, got over it.
ya know what bothers me? people who start projects, but can't finish them. people who start on something, and work at it, but then after awhile they get discouraged after a minor problem, and they abandon the project and move on to something else. it's like... buliding a house. a builer starts to build a house... it's foundation. and then, after something goes slightly wrong, instead of trying to fix the problem so he could go back to building and trying to make it work, he leaves. just leaves the foundation and half built walls behind him as he drives away, never to return or even spare a glance in his rear view mirror. so then the foundation and the half built walls are left behind, looking like crap and lonely and pathetic. the original builer never comes back, but a new one eventually comes along. a new builder, who strikes up the old project, adding his own touches to the house. he finishes the project that the original builder backed out of. the house is now beautiful as it was intended to be, with it's new design. but the original foundation is still there. the foundation that the old builder left behind, worked hard to make, and then left. no matter what new design the house got, no matter who else came along to try and work at the house, to try and make something of it, it would still have the same old foundation from the original builder. a constant reminder that something else could have been of the house, but was abandoned before there was a chance to see the finished project.
whew. feels good to get that little analogy off my chest. lol. seeing that it's 2 in the morning, i'm surprised that i was able to keep my thoughts together enough for what i was trying to get at to make sense.
speaking of 2 AM, maybe i'll be able to sleep tonight. maybe. at least sleep a little better then i have been.
sigh. did i mention that it feels good to be back?
♥Rina
it feels like i should have so much to say... we've been gone for so long! i mean, we needed a break. it was apparent. reaching your breaking point isn't always pretty. but it is when people seem to be the most beautiful. to me, at least. when you are that final moment where you reach the point where it's too much. you aren't capable of handling it anymore. it's just so raw, and real. and that's beautiful. i had reached my breaking point. and i felt real. everything in this world is so fake, and i felt real. and it was freeing.
but i've had time to get over it, and i took advantage of that time, and, subsequently, got over it.
ya know what bothers me? people who start projects, but can't finish them. people who start on something, and work at it, but then after awhile they get discouraged after a minor problem, and they abandon the project and move on to something else. it's like... buliding a house. a builer starts to build a house... it's foundation. and then, after something goes slightly wrong, instead of trying to fix the problem so he could go back to building and trying to make it work, he leaves. just leaves the foundation and half built walls behind him as he drives away, never to return or even spare a glance in his rear view mirror. so then the foundation and the half built walls are left behind, looking like crap and lonely and pathetic. the original builer never comes back, but a new one eventually comes along. a new builder, who strikes up the old project, adding his own touches to the house. he finishes the project that the original builder backed out of. the house is now beautiful as it was intended to be, with it's new design. but the original foundation is still there. the foundation that the old builder left behind, worked hard to make, and then left. no matter what new design the house got, no matter who else came along to try and work at the house, to try and make something of it, it would still have the same old foundation from the original builder. a constant reminder that something else could have been of the house, but was abandoned before there was a chance to see the finished project.
whew. feels good to get that little analogy off my chest. lol. seeing that it's 2 in the morning, i'm surprised that i was able to keep my thoughts together enough for what i was trying to get at to make sense.
speaking of 2 AM, maybe i'll be able to sleep tonight. maybe. at least sleep a little better then i have been.
sigh. did i mention that it feels good to be back?
♥Rina
humourless laughter.
| uh wow. alright. so it's kinda been awhile since i've even looked at this damn blog. i guess i don't really have a reason to anymore right? still confused, still in the dark, still hurt, but i guess there's not much that i can do about that now is there? things are the same. we found places to send our resumes. not that they say much. lol. we've only been taking about a million and ten years to send them of course. i'm not really sure why. but i know that we'll get to it. school's started up again and that takes up most of our time. ew. well what can ya do right? well we've also been exploring our options like we've been working on coreographing dances and such, just to try it. it's really fun!!! now i mean i'm not saying we're good at it or anything, but we sure get a kick out of it :) ha today we went and saw HSM 3!!! it was so corny, but i LOVED IT. why is zac efron so hot? i mean really. it's just not natural or fair. and vanessa hudgens is a whore and doesn't deserve him. of course i'm jealous!! she's freaking gorgeous. yet another thing that's just not fair about life. don't you just love how i'm rambling on about nothing right now? that's the great thing about this blog, no one even looks at it anymore so i can say anything that i freaking feel like. it's wonderful. Ray. i refuse to be weak and show my pain. |
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